Weekend visit and continued ponderances

This weekend, I was honored to host three ladies from SJW, Remmy, Cricket, and Talina. Remmy's Master, Sterling, also joined us (and helped keep Beloved sane in the mist of all the estrogen!).

It was a bit of a fiasco trying to connect at the Shedd Aquarium. I had never been to the aquarium when it was so incredibly BUSY! Between that and the fact that staying in once place with a young boy is really challenging, it was a good two hours before we managed to find the entire party. Lesson learned. Besides that, it was fun, and Boy has asked several times when we are going back to the fishies. *grin* We got membership, so it might be soon...although I think it might be a special no-Girl time.

We departed the aquarium to go and have dinner at House of Sushi and Noodles. No, the irony isn't lost on me. Having had some of the "good" aka "expensive" sushi, I still think that the place is the best deal I've ever had for sushi. It's $17 for all you can eat buffet of 53 different rolls. It took fricken FOREVER to be seated, but it worked out in the end. Between the other women, I even got to eat without holding Girl. Boy even did well, although we did give in and allow him to hang out under the table.

After dinner, everyone came to our house for the night. We stayed up sharing stories and laughing until 11:30, at which point I begged off on account that I get up with the kids. Everyone retired, and I was pleasantly treated to an almost full-night sleep! Boy woke up once with his cough and Beloved dosed him, and Girl slept through until 6:30am!!!

I managed to get Girl and myself out of the bedroom without waking anyone fully, and she and I got breakfast started. Beloved joined us and helped finish up apple pancakes. Our guests trickled down about 9:30, just as the pancakes were ready.

The funny thing about a group with unpartnered submissives...everyone tries to serve everyone else! Talina commented that she might not be able to digest the meal if she couldn't help SOMEHOW. *giggles* We worked it out. Breakfast stretched into a couple of hours of chatting over tea. Then it was time to pack up and see our guests off.

The afternoon was lost to Beloved's insistence that I take a nap with Boy, and I only protested once. *smiles* I was tired and my back has started to misbehave. Dinner and the evening has been delightfully relaxed.

The visit was a wonderful and pondering time for me.

Wonderful because once again, I felt bathed in acceptance. Although I have spent a very limited amount of time with them, the people I met at SJW have become dear and special friends, and each time I have gotten to visit with one of them, I have felt renewed, more confident, and calmer in my path.

Pondering because every glimpse I get into another submissive's life sparks thoughts. In this case, it was mostly how high(er) protocol might fit into the life I share with Beloved and two children. Cricket and Talina jumped up every time one of the Dominants entered the room and asked which seat to take at the table...these are small gestures that simply don't occur to me. Remmy's contentedness to sit at her Master's knee also caught my attention.

After everyone left, before the nap, Beloved asked me if I was jealous. Jealous? No...wistful, perhaps. Mostly because we have children...the mention of attending club or munches inspired some disappointment.

Beloved also suggested that we try doing a week of high protocol.

My immediate reaction was to recoil and search for excuses. I've been trying to puzzle that out for several hours. I think it would be very difficult to do with Beloved. I fear I would be resentful at the corrections from Him. I worry that I will be disillusioned, that I don't know His likes and expectations as well as I think I do. I come close to panic trying to imagine how it would work with Boy and Girl around and filling my days with childhood demands.

At the same time...how much is because I am imagining the magic D/s life that appears in stories and books? Beloved is human and so am I. We live in the REAL world. Do I really think Beloved would be unreasonable in his expectations? *soft sigh* More like I am unreasonable in my own expectations and fear being disappointed, either with Beloved or (more likely) with myself.