so what do you do when...

you have been "out" with a family member for years and years, and they suddenly take issue?

We were invited to hide from the heatwave back at my aunt's air-conditioned house in July. At the time, my cousin was also staying at the house. We asked and were told that it was fine to have a friend with us. We even explained the relationship to the cousin, who then revealed HE had a V-relationship himself.

We were very conscientious and there was no sex, no play, nothing we had to hide from the kids (or anyone else, so we thought). We DID share the master bedroom between the three adults, although a child was often added or an adult subtracted because what else do you do when the kids wake up in the middle of the night? After our stay, we stripped and washed all the linens, restocked the fridge, cleaned the bathrooms, watered the plants, and left things in better shape than when we had arrived.

Tonight, I got a complaint, not from my aunt or my cousin, but from my sister, who says we took advantage of hospitality and are sending mixed messages to the kids and it's wrong.

*raises eyebrow* I am going to resist the urge to turn tables and point at flaws. I'm frustrated and concerned that the claim is "others are uncomfortable". I *think* it's just her being uncomfortable, but it is hard to tell because...well, family talks, right? I don't know quite how to proceed. If I have asked permission of our host to bring a friend, am I "taking advantage"? I feel like I am being forced to choose between my blood-family and my poly-family. Beloved and I have always prided ourselves on being able to balance vanilla and non-vanilla flavors in our lives. Have we been kidding ourselves all along?

The whole thing makes me grumpy.

Bright side, in writing this, I got distracted by looking for poly-themed kids books. There aren't many, but the ones I did find look cute!

Six-Dinner Sid
Else-Marie and Her Seven Little Daddies
Two of Everything

If you happen to know of others, I'd love to know...