Five things was a little too easy, in my opinion. I saw it as "five things you can't live without" and answering "food, water, air, sleep, and shelter". Booooorrrrrring. But TOP five? That is more about what really had an impact.
Beloved's mother died.
This changed things in a lot of ways. She was a highlight in our children's lives when she was well, and her willingness to watch the kids enabled a lot of our adult time. We have had a challenging bunch of years in taking care of her, and that burden is now gone. It is hard to gauge how Beloved and RedVulpes have dealt with the loss...in some ways, they seem unaffected, but I don't believe that is really the case.
I hit some double-depression issues.
Living with dysthymia puts me at a higher risk for depression, and I slid into some ugly places last summer. While I wasn't incapacitated by it, everything around me fell apart. I don't know how much the kids were really aware of it...Momma just let them watch a LOT of television...but I was peripherally aware that we weren't making it to parks or getting out much. The house was awful, my inside plants withered. By August, I realized how bad things were getting and quadrupled my antidepressant and made better efforts to get the sleep and space I needed to find my way out. I'm feeling a little edgy as the doctor is cutting back now...as if yesterday's rant wasn't evidence of that...but I think I can avoid the trap again...for now.
Boy started school full-time.
Wow...there is an entire new set of possibilities that are starting to open up. With Boy gone for seven hours, I am spending real focus with Girl for the first time. I see the developments Boy makes at school. I am starting to imagine new roles that I might take as my daily responsibilities shift from children to...something.
We were publicly outted to my family on poly-lifestyle choices.
This was odd and sad to me. My family has always known that I led a different kind of life, with drum circles, roommates, and alternative beliefs. I have never http://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gifhidden our poly choices, but likewise,http://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gif I haven't paraded it. Because I pushed some boundaries, questions were asked...unfortunately, the questions were not asked to me. Some of the people that I have admired have judged me and found me despicable for my choices; bitter resentment I never knew existed was unearthed. The hurts in this space are deep and confusing to me, and have drastically changed my interactions among certain family members.
Beloved and I did some self-indulgence.
Most of our seventeen years together have been spent very frugally and we take a lot of pride in how well we have managed. Last year, we did some real splurging for the first time. We spent a night at the Herrington Inn and visited the Kingsley House. We enjoyed a couple of Groupons for hotel stays and took advantage of GoldStar for theater tickets. For us, it was a very decadent year, and I discovered that we could manage doing this and not destroy our budget entirely. THAT is pretty cool!
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