Advice and Apologies

So I got this forward entitled "If a dog was the teacher you would learn stuff like:"

Reading it, I had to tweak it just a little, but damn does it make sense...


* When Master come home, always run to greet them.
* Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride.
* Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure ecstasy.
* When it's in your best interest, practice obedience!
* Take naps.
* Stretch before rising.
* Run, romp, and play daily.
* Thrive on attention and let people touch you.
* Avoid snapping and biting when a simple growl will do.
* On warm days, stop to lie on your back in the grass.
* On hot days, drink lots of water and lie under a shady tree.
* When you're happy, dance around and wag your entire body.
* No matter how often you're scolded, don't buy into the guilt thing and pout...run right back and make friends.
* Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.
* Eat with gusto and enthusiasm. Stop when you have had enough
* Be loyal. Never pretend to be something you're not.
* If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it.
* When the Master is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by, and nuzzle them gently.


*soft smile* Silly, but true, right?

Last night, after putting Boy to bed, I slipped into a dress I know Beloved likes, took my hair down and brushed it soft, and picked up my locked collar. I found Beloved in his chair, and when he saw me, he flipped off the television. I didn't know where to start, so I just knelt at his feet, my forehead pressed against his leg. He pet me softly for several long minutes. At last, I peaked up.

"Is there something you'd like to say?"

I nodded, but then hid my eyes again, wished I had something amazing to say. At last, I looked up.

"I'm sorry about Saturday. I'm sorry for losing control. I'm sorry about not mentioning the pills. I'm sorry for not asking for help. Please...please help me learn to be better. I'd like to try again..."

Beloved held out his hand and I gave him the collar. He played with it for a little while, and cleared his throat.

"It's the asking for help that is the biggest one. If you are going to be my pet...my girl...you MUST communicate with me. Just because I am Master doesn't mean that you have to take on this whole house by yourself, but you do need to ask for help.

"If I chain you to your bed or spank you, it is rarely ever going to be a punishment. I will tell you when you are being punished. You have to trust me, that I am doing what I believe is best for you."

I was close to tears again. He held up my collar.

"Are you sure you want this? Absolutely sure?"

I nodded..."Please, yes. If you are willing to accept me again, I will try to do better."

The word "promise" was on the tip of my tongue, but I didn't use it. I know that there are going to be days when the pms grabs me or I have another bad day. I can't promise to be better...but I can definitely try! Apparently Beloved understood all of that because he told me to fetch his keys and then put the collar around my neck.

He then asked my to move the laundry and start some tea for him. When I returned with the cup, he had stripped his pants off. He kissed me softly and then told me he needed my mouth wrapped around him. It was a relief to offer my Master my mouth, to please him and worship him and pleasure him. He admonished me for trying too hard, but I wasn't trying...he came, and held me still as he softened in my mouth. Contentment bathed me, and when we parted, it was only to go up to bed and snuggle into sleep.