What went well (no matter how large of small) in your day today? What didn't go so well?
Look back on your journaling from yesterday--can you find any of the same patterns in
your day between the things that went well and the things that didn't? Are there certain
conflicts in your life that are reoccurring? Is there anything you think you're missing in your current life?
Today, I was, for all practical purposes, on my own. Beloved got up with the kids, made an amazing breakfast for our friends, and I stepped out at about 10am to go to the Farmer's Market and the Louche Puce Market with HBY and SSQ. I got home about 11:30, just in time to give everyone hugs and see THEM out the door.
I spent the entire afternoon in silence, reading my book, doing laundry, and cleaning up my room. I am thrilled with where I got my room to! Everything is put away. I purged a little and have a bag for donations. I finished a re-read of a Mercedes Lackey book. I looked up class schedules and confirmed that I can talk to a program advisor on Monday. I took a bath. I did it all uninterrupted and in blissful silence.
Beloved came home with the kids at about 6:30pm and was utterly exhausted and in fact broke into tears himself. It was a stark reminder of how hard Wednesday has been for me.
*winces* Certain reoccurring conflicts? uh, yeah.
Beloved offered an observation that was a little chilling for me. The time of our relationship that we didn't want kids is much greater than the time of our relationship that we did want kids. I think that is the first time I have EVER heard him confess his frustrations so bluntly, and it hurt. I don't think that either Boy or Girl are particularly outrageous, but the normal abilities of a 5- and 3-year old to just run a body ragged are intense.
Things ARE changing. Kids grow up. Someday...maybe someday...we will actually miss this time. Being in the thick of it, though...it's real hard!
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