Service and rewards

Beloved loves games.

It really doesn't matter what kind of game it is...cards, boards, video, tabletop, LARP...all games have a place in our house. One game in particular, Diplomacy, required seven steadfast players and a whole day of gameplay. Unlike most war-based board games, Diplomacy has no element of chance. The entire game is based on negotiation: Players spend 15 minutes per round forming (and betraying) alliances with other players.

On Sunday, Beloved hosted a Diplomacy game. There were twelve people in attendance (seven players, two alternates, two slaves, and one wife). Although silvara and I were not OBVIOUS slaves, we were definitely in service for the group, and I am extremely grateful for her help and company. While the men played, the rest of us had interesting discussions, ranging from politics to meditation (Beloved's retreat is still very much a topic of interest) to food to weather to childrearing to the sanctity of marriage and the impacts of the feminist movement. Perhaps the latter was the most interesting, since silvara and I had our submissive relationships in mind as we answered...

At one point in the game, Beloved asked if "you girls would cook up some burgers" and I jumped to comply. One of the other players expressed great surprise..."That wouldn't have been MY wife's response..." I had to suppress my laugh.

Keeping Boy occupied was reasonably okay with the other non-players. silvara and I ended up taking him out for a long walk (we only went around the block, but with a 20-month old, that took nearly an hour!).

The game ran for about eight hours. By the end, I was very ready to have some personal quiet "just me" time, but Beloved invited the guys to play some video games. At first, Boy was content to sit with DaDa...but then he wanted the controller. After being given a non-working one, Boy decided he'd had enough of no attention and began to be a nuisance by turning off the television or Xbox. That got the guys angry. I know I was feeling my own exasperation at being forced back into service, but what else could be done?

I grabbed Boy, a serving tray we needed to return, and the stroller, and headed to the park. It was already dusk and the mosquitoes were out, so we walked pretty briskly. When we reached our neighbors' house to return the tray, they decided to join us at the park and then walked us home because it was dark...

It was 9:30...long after Boy's bedtime! Everyone had left and Beloved expressed a bit of worry that we'd disappeared. I bit back a tart reply and set about getting Boy to bed. Returning downstairs, Beloved had finished picking up from the day and pulled me into a warm hug, thanking me for all I'd done during the day. I brushed it off politely...it was what I was expected to do...it was my pleasure to serve...but Beloved shook his head.

I followed him upstairs where I lotioned his feet and climbed into bed next to him. Again, he told me what a wonderful job I'd done all weekend, and that I deserved a treat. Maybe that new collar...

I am stunned. I didn't know how to respond at the idea, but the more I thought about it, the more I'm uncomfortable with such a reward. There are so many other things that need to be purchased for the house and spending $200 on a collar, no matter how beautiful, just makes me feel a little sick to my stomach. Beloved says that I am getting as bad as him about denying myself because there are "more pressing" purchases that could be made...

Does anyone else have difficulty accepting finery or other expensive gifts as a reward for being a good slave? Do you and your Dom have a system for such things?