I'm not sure what came over me Thursday afternoon...it felt like something leeched every bit of energy from me. I don't mean tired...I mean I was scared by the exhaustion. It started to hit while Boy and I were driving, and even singing ABC's and his talking to me wasn't helping. I HAD to get home...but I was in such a fog...I couldn't get my phone to stay on long enough to make a phone call...it just shut off, despite the report that the battery was charged.
Somehow we made it. I literally crawled upstairs, got a movie started for Boy and collapsed. It was about 3 o'clock in the afternoon. I have vague memories of Boy telling me "Show all done, Momma..." but I couldn't move. Little angel that he is, he played with his blocks, read books, came in to prattle at me, but it seems he stayed upstairs the whole time.
Halder was the first to get home at about 5:30, and Boy told him, "Momma sick". I couldn't put two words together and it took real concentration to answer Yes/No questions. Did I need a doctor? No...just...Boy. Take Boy...
Beloved roused me more an hour later, checking me of fever. His cool hands felt so good, but I guess he didn't think I was feverish since he didn't ask me. I had to pee and pulled myself up, but a wave of dizziness and nausea hit as soon as I sat up. I sat there, fighting with my body for long minutes before I mastered the wave. Standing brought sharp pain through my legs, and I doubled over, clutching the bed. It past, and I managed the 10 feet or so to the bathroom, clutching the bed, the dresser, the wall...afraid to let go.
I managed to get back to bed, and lay there, trying to get past the fog in my head. It was going on 8 o'clock. A growing thought possessed me, and I lay perfect still. I couldn't remember feeling the baby move.
I willed my child to give me just a flutter...but it seemed like an eternity before my prayers were answered. It was just a slight shudder...as if the baby, too, were exhausted and leeched...but still alive. I decided to read a bit and concentrate more on movements. I don't really remember much of the story.
Beloved and Boy came in to say good night. Boy climbed up on the bed and pet my hair..."You okay, Momma?" He lay his cheek against mine. "Baby make you sick..." He pat my belly. "All better, Momma. You have good sleeps. I love you."
The child is two years old.
I had to fight my way to the bathroom again before Beloved came to bed about 10 o'clock. Beloved tried to convince me to eat something, but I vehemently declined. He gave me a sad, worried look, but didn't argue. When he lay down and turned off the lights, I'd already been laying there, sleeping mostly, for seven hours...I was sure sleep wouldn't come...but the next thing I knew, it was 4 in the morning. The fog had lifted and Baby was kicking. I had no trouble getting to the bathroom, although I fell back to sleep almost immediately.
When the Boy came padding in about 7:30 am, I felt almost normal. I had a headache, but I wasn't sick or fogged up anymore. We ate breakfast and saw Beloved off to work. I took it easy all day...Boy seems to understand, even, and only asked to go to the park once. He and I both ended up taking naps in the afternoon, and by after dinner, I felt fine. Baby seemed happier too...I've been kicked to kingdom come and was up until nearly dawn with the tap-dancing last night.
It was bizarre and scary, and I hope whatever it was, it never happens again.
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